You are a role model whether you think so or not | DFS 333

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Jennifer, welcome to Destin for success.

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I'm your host. Jennifer Takagi, and today I want to talk about

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something. Where are my notes? Nobody knows. Here they are. I

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want to talk about the fact that you are a role model, whether

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you want to be or not, or whether you think you are or

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not, you're being watched. Everybody's watching everything

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you do. I I had somebody in my office one time who never got

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selected for promotions, like things would come up, and this

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person was not selected. And one day, I happened to be speaking

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to another supervisor that she had shown up on their list to be

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promoted and never had. And I said, Hey, you know, is there

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any particular reason that this keeps happening? And the

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response was, I hear things around the office, how this

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person interacts with other people, and I just don't need

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that in my division. And I thought it was very interesting,

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because although we were somewhat of a small office. We

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were also very divided, very separate. Our work didn't

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always, you know, cross paths. So it was interesting to me that

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somebody like knew that, that they knew that, for me

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personally, one time there was a position I really wanted, there

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was a big reorganization going on, and there was this position

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I really wanted in the reorg, and the way they were doing it,

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I could just be slotted into it. I didn't have to apply or

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anything. I was just going to be moved over. It was a lateral

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transfer. And one day, a gentleman who again, worked at

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the other side of the building, came up to me and said, Hey, do

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you have a minute? Can we go talk in the conference room.

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Sure our offices were always very open. There was virtually

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no privacy anywhere. So we went in a conference room, and he

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said, I'm on the committee to help reassign people to where

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they're going to go, and I've really been advocating for you

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to have this one position. And I decided, before I went any

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further, I should ask you if you even want it. And I said, Yes.

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How did you know? And he said, Well, I didn't know for sure,

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but I just thought you'd be really good at it. And I was

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stunned, like, how did he even know what I did? Like we were

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opposite, into the building, we were in different departments,

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so that at a pretty young age of my career really showed me, told

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me, demonstrated that people know what you're doing, whether

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you're thinking that they're watching you or not. So you

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really are that role model. One time, I was flying to

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Washington, DC on Easter Sunday, because that was a good move.

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And I knew there had been tornados and storms overnight,

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but I didn't really check the weather, because I typically

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don't, and I was reading the Game of Thrones book series, and

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if you know anything about those books, or over 1000 pages a

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piece. So I I'm at the airport, and I have my Kindle, and I'm

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reading away. And I don't know at this point what time it is, I

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just everybody gets up and stands to get on this American

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Airlines flight to Dallas, and I just stand up with everybody

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else, and I don't really know what's going on, but I get in

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line, and one of the gate agents comes up and hands me a little

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card, and I said, Oh, I'm sorry. What is this for? And she said,

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there was a tornado in Dallas this morning, and most of the

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flights have been delayed, and your our flight out of Oklahoma

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City is late, so you might miss your flight. You need to call

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this 800 number. Oh, okay, so I call the 800 number, and it's

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very pleasant. Person says, Oh, you've been rebooked at 7:30pm

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and I said, Oh, great. Okay, thanks. And I hung up. So I get

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to Dallas, and I'm supposed to, this is before everything was so

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automated. I'm supposed to get in the customer service line and

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get a new boarding pass. So I stand in this long line and

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people are upset, and it's Easter Sunday, and they're

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trying to get home, or they're trying to go visit somebody.

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It's just crazy. I just, I never knew Easter Sunday was such a

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big travel day. So I'm standing in line, and it's finally my

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turn, and this whole time I'm reading this book, I'm just like

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engrossed, and I get to the ticket agent, very nice man, and

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I. Did my boarding pass, and I said, I'm going to be your

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easiest customer all day. I just need you to print me a new

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boarding pass for my 730 flight tonight. And he goes, Oh, okay,

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clickety, clickety, click. You can hear him click it away on

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the keyboard. And he said, ma'am. Your your flight is for

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tomorrow at 730 Not tonight. You know it? Oh well, I'm no longer

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your nicest, best passenger, because I have to be at a

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meeting in the morning at 10 o'clock in Washington, DC. So I

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need, I need a flight today. And he went, I don't know, clickety,

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click, clickity, click, and he goes, I have you on a flight at

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1030 tonight. And he hit print. I had a ticket, and I got to

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Washington, DC at like, you know, one or two in the morning

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and but I made my meeting on time. I'm pretty sure if I had

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gone up to that desk and acted a fool and been a brat, I probably

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wouldn't have gotten that boarding pass, and I'm never

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going to know, but I hope that my actions and being cool and

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calm and a little bit humorous and light hearted about the

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situation might have helped somebody else. As it is, I'm

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about to go on a flight in the next day, and there's an ice

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storm in Dallas, and there, it hadn't happened yet, but three

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days before my flight, they started saying this is going to

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happen. You might want to change your arrangements. So I call

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American Airlines, and this guy's like, and it was like,

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Well, I'm I'm flying on Friday through Dallas, and they're

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supposed to be an ice storm. And if you're from any part of the

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world where you don't get ice storms, you may not understand

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this, but like, when it's ice you can't do anything about it.

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We don't get it often enough. We don't have appropriate

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equipment, and it's dangerous. You just your car, your

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airplane, they just kind of do their own thing because it's

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ice. It is not snow. There's no traction being had by anybody.

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So I didn't know about that, and he's just kind of clicking some

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buttons and, well, I could reroute you through Charlotte.

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I'm trying to get to Florida. I can reroute you through

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Charlotte. Oh, wait, they're supposed to have storms too. And

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he's, he's just like, there's no enthusiasm. And finally, I said,

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Well, what if I flew on a different day? And he goes, Oh,

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well, let me see what I've got. Can you fly on Thursday? Do you

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want morning? Afternoon? Do you want an aisle? Do you want a

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window? And all of a sudden, he's really friendly, and I

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can't help but think it was because he knows he's going to

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get hammered with calls, with people throwing fence because

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their flights are delayed, they're canceled, whatever. But

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I just hung with him until he was willing to, you know, up his

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game and be friendly. It wasn't that he was rude before, but he

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wasn't friendly and happy about it. So we we don't know who

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we're impacting or how, but we carry ourselves, we put off into

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the world how we are, like, there are people, you know

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instantaneously, they're in a mood. I had a boss. I could tell

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by the steps it was going to be a rough day. It's going to be a

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rough one. Like, I could hear it in the the steps, the the

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heaviness of the steps. Uh, other days I'd be like, Oh, it's

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probably going to be a pretty good day. That sounds pretty

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good. You can pick up on people's emotions and what's

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going on, and you can also impact other people's emotions

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and how they're feeling in the world. And we forget that we're

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role modeling all the time. You don't have to have a title, you

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don't have to have a position, you don't have to have a team

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that's following you. People are watching. They know what's going

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on. I saw this really firsthand, when a couple of people in

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higher management positions were not following rules, and their

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employees, they were watching, and they built a case and and

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those supervisors in one case fired and was found guilty in a

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federal court and did prison time, and The other one was

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given the opportunity to retire early and go or be fired, and he

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retired early. So people were watching.

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They think, oh, nobody's really noticing me or what's going on.

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People are watching. You're influencing them. You don't have

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to have a title to have a powerful impact on people. Mm.

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And they recognize it, and they notice it. I was called in one

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day and told that I was being given a temporary promotion, and

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I was shocked. I didn't even know they were going to fill it,

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much less put me in the position. And they had a staff

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meeting to announce it, and one of the ladies that was now going

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to be on my team, I was now the supervisor, said you couldn't

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have picked a better person like I'm so glad you chose her.

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She'll she'll have the attitude and mentality to to keep this

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all moving forward and going. And I was shocked, send and

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thrilled and honored, because I tried to carry myself with a

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level of professionalism, with a whole lot of humor and sarcasm

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involved. But I tried to do the right thing and and get my work

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done, and, you know, basically, be a good steward with the

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position I was in, and I went on and I was a supervisor, I don't

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know, eight or nine years before I retired, and like, I got a lot

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of satisfaction out of that. I really enjoyed leading people

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and being in a an actual position versus just a quasi

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position, because I ended up leading a lot of teams and a lot

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of projects without the title. And you can and you should,

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like, we're all called to leadership of some sort, and it

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just depends on where it is. Is it in your kids school? Is it in

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your office? Is it in your church? Is it in your

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neighborhood, your neighborhood association? Those need a lot of

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help. I'm not active in mine at all, but there are people that

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are and I'm happy for that, but people are watching you. They

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know what's going on, and they see how you show up and when you

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choose to leave yourself with integrity and schedule your day

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your life, whether it's a tight scheduler, a flexible schedule.

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It doesn't really matter, but when you live up to the things

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that you say you're you're going to do, other people notice and

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other people see it, and if they weren't thinking they were going

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to do it, it empowers them to make that choice. When I was in

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high school, I just took the next class. I never thought of

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it any other way. I just took the next class. I was in seventh

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grade, I took seventh grade math. I was in eighth grade, I

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took eighth grade math. I was in ninth grade, I took Algebra One.

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I was in 10th grade, I took geometry. I was a junior, I took

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Algebra Two. My senior year, I took trig, Algebra three. What

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nobody bothered to tell me is, I think after geometry, I didn't

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need any more math, like I could graduate high school at that

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point. But I didn't know. I just the other people in the school

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that I was friends with, and they were super smart, way

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smarter than me. They were taking these classes, and I just

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took the next class and the next class and the next class, I was

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following them, and they were being leaders, and it led me to

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take all the classes I needed to be able to get into college. I

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don't I didn't know any different. I just took the next

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class because I was doing what my friends and other people

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around me were do, are doing and were doing. So you create a

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ripple effect, and and people see it, and they take notice.

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And the question is, how do you want to show up in the world?

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You're being watched. You're setting an example. But you have

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the ability to choose right now, how you want to show up, how you

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want to show up in the world, how you want to show up for your

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family, for your partner, your kids, your relatives, like who

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do you want to be? How do you want to show up? I was teaching

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a class for the great state of Oklahoma, and it was a

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leadership class, and at the first break, this woman came up

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to me, she was in tears, and she was like, I'm a terrible

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supervisor. I'm just the worst I'm not doing any of this stuff.

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And I said, it's okay, you have the ability to do better

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tomorrow. And thankfully, most of us do have an opportunity

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tomorrow to do better and to be better. And in one of those

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classes, somebody put on the evaluation. I think she thought

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she was being very negative, but she put she's just too perky for

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me. About me, and I thought, I'll take it. I'll take it. I'll

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take perky, rather than being Eeyore and gloom and doom trying

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to teach a class and keep people's attention, that was

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even a two day class, so two solid days of me. It's a lot

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people. I'm just telling you. And I'm glad I kept them there.

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I had 36 people in that class, I think, and for two solid days,

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and most of everybody else appreciated the perkiness, and

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then I was upbeat versus let's go through the material. So it's

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your choice. How do you want to show up, you are a role model.

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If you didn't know it, I just told you, boom, you're a role

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model. I just I deem you that because you are and you get to

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choose how you want to show up, if you would like a little help

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with this and finding out, like, where you might be able to do a

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little bit better, have a little more focus, book a discovery

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call. The link's in the chat, not in the chat. I'm so used to

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chatting in zoom rooms. Uh, the link is in the show notes.

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You're already on your phone, so you can click the link and book

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a call. Um, also get my 12 minute gift. And it's 12 minute

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gift. Com, Anna, I have an audio series on 12 minutes to win, I'm

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Jennifer Takagi, and I look forward to connecting with you

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soon. I'll stop the video at some point, like if only hope.