Lainne Love shares How to Bring Spirit into Psychology | DFS 319

Jennifer Takagi: 00:00:00

Jennifer, welcome to the destined for

Jennifer Takagi: 00:00:05

success podcast. I'm your host, Jennifer Takagi, and this

Jennifer Takagi: 00:00:10

podcast used to be called new manager, media manage. Ride from

Jennifer Takagi: 00:00:15

the start. Many of the concepts are the same, but there's a

Jennifer Takagi: 00:00:19

little shift. There's a shift, because I know we are all

Jennifer Takagi: 00:00:24

destined for success, and I want to help you find the fastest,

Jennifer Takagi: 00:00:30

smoothest way to reach your highest best as quickly as

Jennifer Takagi: 00:00:34

possible. Join me in today's episode where you're going to

Jennifer Takagi: 00:00:38

come up with new ways to build your skills and influence others

Jennifer Takagi: 00:00:44

to make the impact you desire to make. I look forward to

Jennifer Takagi: 00:00:48

connecting with you soon. Welcome to Destin for success.

Jennifer Takagi: 00:00:55

I'm your host, Jennifer Takagi, and today we have the honor and

Jennifer Takagi: 00:00:59

the privilege to hear from Miss Lani love, and she's a mama.

Jennifer Takagi: 00:01:04

She's into spiritual psychology, and she's in Canada. I keep

Jennifer Takagi: 00:01:08

collecting all these Canadians. It's so much fun. Welcome to the

Jennifer Takagi: 00:01:12

show. Lainey,

Lainne Love: 00:01:13

hi. Thank you so much for having me. It's amazing

Lainne Love: 00:01:16

to be here with you. Well,

Jennifer Takagi: 00:01:18

thanks. And I'm very curious about this term,

Jennifer Takagi: 00:01:20

spiritual psychology. Can you go into more detail on that?

Lainne Love: 00:01:26

Absolutely sure. Well, you know the short

Lainne Love: 00:01:30

definition is just bringing spirit into psychology, right?

Lainne Love: 00:01:33

Because we're familiar that psychology is the study of the

Lainne Love: 00:01:38

mind and how it works and how it affects our behavior, basically.

Lainne Love: 00:01:41

And spiritual psychology just expands on that, in that we are

Lainne Love: 00:01:48

more than just our minds. You know, we're integrating all the

Lainne Love: 00:01:52

other aspects of ourselves, but also nature. And this, this idea

Lainne Love: 00:01:59

of wholeness that spirituality brings. We're all

Lainne Love: 00:02:03

interconnected, so the mind is, yes, very important, and we are

Lainne Love: 00:02:08

more than just our mind. And more than just our mind affects

Lainne Love: 00:02:12

our behavior and the results in our lives. Ah,

Jennifer Takagi: 00:02:16

that's a very succinct definition. I love that

Jennifer Takagi: 00:02:20

that's like something I can wrap my head around. So when we talk

Jennifer Takagi: 00:02:24

about success, that podcast is destined for success. Like,

Jennifer Takagi: 00:02:27

what's your journey been? What do you do? How do you show up in

Jennifer Takagi: 00:02:30

the world? Oh, Lauren,

Lainne Love: 00:02:32

success has been such a trigger word for me,

Jennifer Takagi: 00:02:37

something different for everybody, right,

Jennifer Takagi: 00:02:39

right? Yeah, no,

Lainne Love: 00:02:40

in a in a wonderful, playful way, in a

Lainne Love: 00:02:45

really super annoying, frustrating way, success. I've

Lainne Love: 00:02:48

had a really interesting relationship with it. What does

Lainne Love: 00:02:51

it actually mean? What does it mean to me? What does it mean,

Lainne Love: 00:02:54

and what does it mean to me? And I have had a lot of success in

Lainne Love: 00:02:58

my life, and are there still some things that I'm looking to

Lainne Love: 00:03:02

have more success in? But I came from, you know, I had a teenage

Lainne Love: 00:03:09

mama and for four kids, and obviously, as a teenager, she

Lainne Love: 00:03:14

didn't have, really have the skills, tools and abilities to

Lainne Love: 00:03:19

be able to create a safe or nurturing environment. So

Lainne Love: 00:03:23

there's a lot of chaos and a lot of turmoil, and definitely

Lainne Love: 00:03:30

experience different types of abuse growing up, and that's

Lainne Love: 00:03:36

okay, that's that was shaping me into the person that that I

Lainne Love: 00:03:42

needed to become, and has been a catalyst in the direction that

Lainne Love: 00:03:48

I've taken my life. So, you know, if you, if you've had a

Lainne Love: 00:03:52

challenge, I've likely faced something similar. So when it

Lainne Love: 00:03:57

comes to, you know, this idea of success, one overcoming

Lainne Love: 00:04:00

challenges that success for me. But one and another thing about

Lainne Love: 00:04:06

overcoming challenges is not just the doing of it, but also

Lainne Love: 00:04:10

like the celebration of what what that is, and my attitude

Lainne Love: 00:04:15

towards it, because it's one thing to, you know, meet some

Lainne Love: 00:04:21

sort of goal, or to have overcome the hurdle, but if your

Lainne Love: 00:04:25

mind is still, or your heart or your spirit is still stuck in a

Lainne Love: 00:04:31

dark place, well, to me, then I that's not the part of the

Lainne Love: 00:04:35

success. The the success, to me, more and more, is the inner the

Lainne Love: 00:04:41

inner journey that then produces the outer results. And it's

Lainne Love: 00:04:45

taken me a really long time to actually understand what that is

Lainne Love: 00:04:50

and to get it. And I'm really, really grateful to finally get

Lainne Love: 00:04:57

it after bashing my head against that wall 20 times. Times or 100

Lainne Love: 00:05:01

really, or more, if I'm being really honest, I've had to

Lainne Love: 00:05:05

repeat the same lessons many, many times. Ah, so

Jennifer Takagi: 00:05:09

you just get tired of that. I had, he goes

Jennifer Takagi: 00:05:14

spiritual healer, and he said, Whatever he said. And I went,

Jennifer Takagi: 00:05:18

Wait, didn't we do that. Hey, I wanted that to be over and gone.

Jennifer Takagi: 00:05:23

So, yeah, but I love that the inner journey produces the outer

Jennifer Takagi: 00:05:28

results, because that is how it works. Um, I do energy healing

Jennifer Takagi: 00:05:33

and release trapped emotions for clients and and myself, and it's

Jennifer Takagi: 00:05:38

very interesting that if you don't clear out that junk and

Jennifer Takagi: 00:05:43

get it in line, you can't end up with those results that you're

Jennifer Takagi: 00:05:46

hoping for. So Right?

Lainne Love: 00:05:49

And it's so I felt like it's so annoying that

Lainne Love: 00:05:52

that's the journey, because that's what you hear. And I know

Lainne Love: 00:05:55

I gotta go around it some way, or there's gotta be a faster

Lainne Love: 00:05:59

way, or that's not the way. It can't be. Can't be that simple,

Lainne Love: 00:06:04

because it's not easy work, but it feels like it's too simple

Lainne Love: 00:06:07

like that. That couldn't be the way, but that really is the way.

Lainne Love: 00:06:11

It's just move out. And actually it's it's perfectly designed

Lainne Love: 00:06:16

because the stuff that comes up your challenge or the emotion or

Lainne Love: 00:06:19

the frustration or the fear, however it manifests, whatever

Lainne Love: 00:06:23

it looks like, that's actually when you overcome that. That's

Lainne Love: 00:06:27

like the step that brings you up to the next level. So, you know,

Lainne Love: 00:06:31

imagine you're playing a video game. It's like, oh, I defeated

Lainne Love: 00:06:34

this foe. Now I leveled up. I'm on the I'm on the next level.

Lainne Love: 00:06:39

That's actually what happens so when you're feeling the fear,

Lainne Love: 00:06:42

the frustration or the anger, when you meet it and you

Lainne Love: 00:06:46

overcome it, or you love it, or you transmute it, whatever word

Lainne Love: 00:06:51

or experience you want to use, the result is that you level up.

Lainne Love: 00:06:56

So it's actually a gift, and that is the the opportunity, the

Lainne Love: 00:07:02

invitation, the in the entry door to what it is that you're

Lainne Love: 00:07:07

actually wanting. And when I learned to see that that was the

Lainne Love: 00:07:13

truth of it, to understand that that was the truth of it, then

Lainne Love: 00:07:17

my relationship to challenges and fears and frustrations, like

Lainne Love: 00:07:22

all the things that seem to be weighing me down, all of a

Lainne Love: 00:07:26

sudden, they they lost their gravity. I can't say that I'm

Lainne Love: 00:07:32

still not frustrated or that I don't feel fear or any of those

Lainne Love: 00:07:38

emotions, but I I shifted a lot faster, oh, oh, this is, this

Lainne Love: 00:07:44

needs to be cleared, so then I can move on to the the next

Lainne Love: 00:07:47

thing. And that's actually pretty exciting,

Jennifer Takagi: 00:07:52

well, and it's, it is exciting. And, like I have

Jennifer Takagi: 00:07:59

heard in very traditional, I'm going to use the word therapy

Jennifer Takagi: 00:08:04

very loosely, but it's always Oh, it's hard work. It's a it

Jennifer Takagi: 00:08:10

takes a long time. You got to process it all. And that never

Jennifer Takagi: 00:08:16

really set super well with me. And so when I got into energy

Jennifer Takagi: 00:08:20

healing. And I found out it can be fast, it can be easy, it can

Jennifer Takagi: 00:08:23

be like, it can be as fast as you want it to be, or it can be

Jennifer Takagi: 00:08:27

as slow as you want it to be, but we have way more control

Jennifer Takagi: 00:08:31

over that. And that was very exciting to me, because I want

Jennifer Takagi: 00:08:33

to clear it and move on. Like, okay, yeah, okay, recognize that

Jennifer Takagi: 00:08:38

I see it. Now. What's next? Like, move on to the next better

Jennifer Takagi: 00:08:42

thing.

Lainne Love: 00:08:44

Amen to that. And it's it does not take years. I

Lainne Love: 00:08:47

love that you brought that up. It can, it can, like it took me

Lainne Love: 00:08:53

many, many years, but it took me many, many years because I kept

Lainne Love: 00:08:58

avoiding doing the work. So for anybody that's experiencing that

Lainne Love: 00:09:02

I was doing all of the things. I was hiring the coaches, going to

Lainne Love: 00:09:07

the therapist, get doing the body work, getting, getting

Lainne Love: 00:09:11

Reiki, healing, all of the things. So I thought I was doing

Lainne Love: 00:09:14

the work. But there's a difference between showing up

Lainne Love: 00:09:20

and doing the the appointment and actually going home and

Lainne Love: 00:09:27

carrying the appointment. You know, basically doing your

Lainne Love: 00:09:31

homework is actually doing the work. So, you know, like I've I

Lainne Love: 00:09:38

bought the books, I read the book, but did I implement the

Lainne Love: 00:09:41

knowledge or the wisdom that I learned from the book into my

Lainne Love: 00:09:46

life? There's a big difference between reading the book and

Lainne Love: 00:09:49

actually taking action and becoming what was in the book,

Lainne Love: 00:09:55

what the book suggested. So I read 100 books and thinking that

Lainne Love: 00:09:59

a. I Well, now I know it. I wasn't doing it. And I didn't

Lainne Love: 00:10:05

know that I wasn't doing it because I thought that reading

Lainne Love: 00:10:08

the book meant that I was doing it. I thought that going to the

Lainne Love: 00:10:10

appointment meant that I was doing it. So wasn't purposely

Lainne Love: 00:10:14

trying not to do it. I was investing a lot of time, money,

Lainne Love: 00:10:18

energy and effort into doing it without without realizing how I

Lainne Love: 00:10:23

was feeling myself or self sabotaging really.

Jennifer Takagi: 00:10:29

How do you make that shift into actually doing

Jennifer Takagi: 00:10:32

it

Lainne Love: 00:10:34

by noticing that so one and that last note that I

Lainne Love: 00:10:38

just said was self sabotage. There are different layers of

Lainne Love: 00:10:43

work that we get to do. And isn't it wonderful that you

Lainne Love: 00:10:47

know, as we were mentioning earlier about therapy, that are

Lainne Love: 00:10:49

an energy healing, that there are all these different

Lainne Love: 00:10:52

modalities and they all work. It's so great. It's so great

Lainne Love: 00:10:57

that they all work, and there's a there are better ones at

Lainne Love: 00:11:01

different times in your life, for for different things. Just

Lainne Love: 00:11:04

like any toolbox, hammers work. They work every single time, but

Lainne Love: 00:11:09

they don't really work well. If you need a screwdriver, it's not

Lainne Love: 00:11:14

the right tool. Doesn't mean that a hammer doesn't work. So

Lainne Love: 00:11:17

it's the same thing when you're looking at doing your healing

Lainne Love: 00:11:21

work. So what I needed to do was work on my subconscious

Lainne Love: 00:11:25

programming, because I kept sabotaging myself, because that

Lainne Love: 00:11:29

was the program. And so when I started working more on that,

Lainne Love: 00:11:34

and actually sitting with my emotions, is growing up in so

Lainne Love: 00:11:39

much chaos and experiencing so many different types of abuse.

Lainne Love: 00:11:44

You know, like most people that have experienced that in their

Lainne Love: 00:11:49

life, they push down. Well, actually, any human, most

Lainne Love: 00:11:52

humans, that's what we do, is we have an emotion and we push it

Lainne Love: 00:11:55

down. We don't think to actually let ourselves feel at an

Lainne Love: 00:11:59

experience. So then we can let it go. So I pushed down

Lainne Love: 00:12:05

emotions, but also I never acknowledged traumatic

Lainne Love: 00:12:09

experiences. So even even now, I'm still unwinding that unlike

Lainne Love: 00:12:15

what an actual traumatic experience is, because it was

Lainne Love: 00:12:19

always like that, get up and keep going. And there is a

Lainne Love: 00:12:22

beauty in that. There's a beauty in the ability that if I get

Lainne Love: 00:12:26

knocked down, I'm not gonna, like, sit there, I'm gonna get

Lainne Love: 00:12:30

up and keep going. And then that also leaves me with a lot of

Lainne Love: 00:12:35

stuff that I'm gonna have to eventually get back to, because

Lainne Love: 00:12:39

if you're getting up and keeping going amazing. It doesn't mean

Lainne Love: 00:12:43

that you still don't have to deal with the stuff. And that's

Lainne Love: 00:12:46

what I didn't I didn't put those two things together because I

Lainne Love: 00:12:49

had gotten up and kept going. So how do I still have the stuff to

Lainne Love: 00:12:53

deal with? Well, it's still waiting to be acknowledged like

Lainne Love: 00:12:57

and there's something in the healing process called being the

Lainne Love: 00:12:59

witness, and sometimes all you need to do is just like, Oh, I'm

Lainne Love: 00:13:04

just gonna sit with myself and acknowledge that that actually

Lainne Love: 00:13:07

happened. Because in a lot of abusive situations, you're told

Lainne Love: 00:13:11

that that didn't even happen, and so you're really confused

Lainne Love: 00:13:14

within yourself. But did that actually happen? And I'm sure it

Lainne Love: 00:13:18

did, but I just, I just need somebody to just, yeah, that

Lainne Love: 00:13:22

actually happened. Wow. Okay, I'm acknowledging that. I'm

Lainne Love: 00:13:26

going to sit with myself so that I don't have to carry it around

Lainne Love: 00:13:30

anymore, because all I was waiting was for somebody to just

Lainne Love: 00:13:33

say that actually happened. And that's a real part of the

Lainne Love: 00:13:37

healing process, too. And sometimes it's enough for you to

Lainne Love: 00:13:40

be the witness, and sometimes you need to say it in front of

Lainne Love: 00:13:42

somebody else. And that's another benefit that we have of

Lainne Love: 00:13:46

working with healers or therapists or or coaches, is

Lainne Love: 00:13:49

just having somebody else actually be witness to our human

Lainne Love: 00:13:53

experience.

Jennifer Takagi: 00:13:55

And so when you say acknowledge that it

Jennifer Takagi: 00:13:58

happened, it doesn't have to actually or necessarily be

Jennifer Takagi: 00:14:02

somebody that witnessed it. It could be you sharing your story

Jennifer Takagi: 00:14:07

with someone and them acknowledging it with you. Yes,

Jennifer Takagi: 00:14:11

okay, I just needed to clarify that, right, absolutely. Story.

Jennifer Takagi: 00:14:16

You don't have the people around that could

Lainne Love: 00:14:19

Yeah, often it's those people that are the ones

Lainne Love: 00:14:21

that are most resistant to actually being, to being a

Lainne Love: 00:14:25

witness to what happened, because they don't want to admit

Lainne Love: 00:14:27

it to themselves, also because of the pain that's in that's

Lainne Love: 00:14:31

involved with that, that either they have to take responsibility

Lainne Love: 00:14:35

or witness their own pain, that'll that allowed that whole

Lainne Love: 00:14:40

experience to take place. And that's that's a whole other

Lainne Love: 00:14:43

layer and something else that's like getting into karma and

Lainne Love: 00:14:46

spirituality and all these cool things that we experience in

Lainne Love: 00:14:51

being human beings. Yeah,

Jennifer Takagi: 00:14:54

well, I heard what like to wrap up several

Jennifer Takagi: 00:14:59

things that. You've said that were so impactful, people will

Jennifer Takagi: 00:15:04

read the Bible, for instance, multiple times, and a scripture

Jennifer Takagi: 00:15:10

will be revealed to them. Is how I've often heard it put I told

Jennifer Takagi: 00:15:15

you that camera freeze for half a second, um, a scripture will

Jennifer Takagi: 00:15:19

be revealed and it will mean something different that you're

Jennifer Takagi: 00:15:23

reading it now than when you read it eight or 10 years ago.

Jennifer Takagi: 00:15:26

And it's kind of that same thing of, oh, wait, this feels

Jennifer Takagi: 00:15:32

different this time around, like I I recognize, I recognize the

Jennifer Takagi: 00:15:37

pattern now because I'm ready to see the pattern and make a shift

Jennifer Takagi: 00:15:42

in the pattern. Because, like, for years, I was, I was just

Jennifer Takagi: 00:15:46

living life like there wasn't really a plan. My plan was to

Jennifer Takagi: 00:15:51

get a good job, make good money, save for retirement and make a

Jennifer Takagi: 00:15:55

difference and it I didn't have, like, a etched in stone plan.

Jennifer Takagi: 00:15:59

Like some people I'm going to do this, this, this and this, and

Jennifer Takagi: 00:16:02

this is who I'm going to be. And, like, my plan was a lot

Jennifer Takagi: 00:16:05

more fluid than that, but when I look back, like, everything I

Jennifer Takagi: 00:16:09

did, like, led to this moment where I'm actually interviewing

Jennifer Takagi: 00:16:13

people for a podcast that I had that was not that was not on my

Jennifer Takagi: 00:16:18

bucket list, it wasn't on my radar. When I was first told,

Jennifer Takagi: 00:16:22

you need to have a podcast, I didn't even know what a podcast

Jennifer Takagi: 00:16:24

was. So, you know, you evolve, you're ready. And sometimes I I

Jennifer Takagi: 00:16:30

think Dr Phil does a lot of really great work, and I love on

Jennifer Takagi: 00:16:35

his shows where he goes. How's that working for you? And it's

Jennifer Takagi: 00:16:41

the same kind of thing, like, we decide, wait a minute, that

Jennifer Takagi: 00:16:46

behavior is no longer serving me, it is not working for me.

Jennifer Takagi: 00:16:50

What can I do differently? And working with a spiritual healer,

Jennifer Takagi: 00:16:52

she pointed out some things. I was like, No, I don't know. I

Jennifer Takagi: 00:16:57

don't think that's right. And then I'm in a group setting, and

Jennifer Takagi: 00:17:04

I'm like, shit. I just did that. I just did what she said, that I

Jennifer Takagi: 00:17:08

was doing like and then once you recognize it, you can choose

Jennifer Takagi: 00:17:13

that, yeah, it's working for me. I'm going to keep doing it. Or

Jennifer Takagi: 00:17:17

maybe that's not working for me quite the way I thought it was

Jennifer Takagi: 00:17:20

maybe, yeah, not do it the same way and and some of the

Jennifer Takagi: 00:17:25

trainings I do with people, it's, it's not that you're

Jennifer Takagi: 00:17:29

required to change or grow or evolve or get over your past.

Jennifer Takagi: 00:17:35

It's how is that serving you, and is that where you want to

Jennifer Takagi: 00:17:40

say, and if the answer is yes, that's your choice. But if

Jennifer Takagi: 00:17:44

you're ready to evolve and move, there are ways to do it. And it

Jennifer Takagi: 00:17:48

can be quick, it can be easy. Yeah, you just have to commit to

Jennifer Takagi: 00:17:52

I want to do this,

Lainne Love: 00:17:54

and thank God for that. It's as It's as quick and

Lainne Love: 00:17:58

as easy as you let it to be, as as you let it be for yourself,

Lainne Love: 00:18:03

and sometimes that that's an interesting dance. You know when

Lainne Love: 00:18:10

your mind knows something like my my brother passed away this

Lainne Love: 00:18:14

year. He overdosed and thank you. I'm like sending blessings

Lainne Love: 00:18:24

to him, for sure, but knowing that, that he's in peace now is

Lainne Love: 00:18:31

knowing he's in peace right now brings, brings me peace for him,

Lainne Love: 00:18:39

but wrapping so in my, in my mind, it was a relief, actually,

Lainne Love: 00:18:48

because he, he was on the streets for most of his adult

Lainne Love: 00:18:52

life and experienced a lot of pain, and so it was a relief. It

Lainne Love: 00:19:03

was very, very sad, because it's sad that something like that

Lainne Love: 00:19:07

becomes a relief, and then that's something to contemplate

Lainne Love: 00:19:09

and look at. And, you know, my level of responsibility and like

Lainne Love: 00:19:14

karmic journeys and what his life was about, all of those

Lainne Love: 00:19:18

things to contemplate. So my mind really understood, and my

Lainne Love: 00:19:22

mind had a lot of peace, and yet the my human, my my human, still

Lainne Love: 00:19:28

had to go through this grieving process. And I've, I found that

Lainne Love: 00:19:33

so fascinating, because I've, I've had people in my life pass

Lainne Love: 00:19:38

away, and it was a different process. But then this

Lainne Love: 00:19:41

particular experience, as my mind had peace around it, but my

Lainne Love: 00:19:47

body and my human and my heart still had so much to process. So

Lainne Love: 00:19:53

experiencing those two different different experiences at the

Lainne Love: 00:19:59

same. Same time was so interesting to me. So I just say

Lainne Love: 00:20:02

that in the in the time part, although I felt like my mind

Lainne Love: 00:20:07

accepted it in like, almost right away, there was still a

Lainne Love: 00:20:11

part of me that was lagging behind, but maybe not lagging

Lainne Love: 00:20:15

behind. It was in its own time to process. Like I could sit

Lainne Love: 00:20:19

here and stare at a wall and five hours would pass by, I'd be

Lainne Love: 00:20:22

like, Oh my god, I literally just stared at the wall because

Lainne Love: 00:20:26

that's where I needed to be. And so when you're working through

Lainne Love: 00:20:31

something in your life, if you have a handle on it, but you're

Lainne Love: 00:20:36

not moving as fast as you want, just let yourself have moved

Lainne Love: 00:20:42

through it in whatever that timing is, and give yourself

Lainne Love: 00:20:47

also a little bit of time as much as we want to speed through

Lainne Love: 00:20:49

things and we want it now, I know I want it now and then it

Lainne Love: 00:20:52

means I actually go slower then I actually would have went if I

Lainne Love: 00:20:58

would have Just let myself go through the process, instead of

Lainne Love: 00:21:02

trying to speed myself along. So knowing that it's possible, that

Lainne Love: 00:21:07

it can happen instantaneously is so important, because it is

Lainne Love: 00:21:12

important to have the counter narrative that it doesn't take

Lainne Love: 00:21:16

years, because it doesn't have to. And if it takes two years,

Lainne Love: 00:21:20

that's okay too. It's just knowing that all things are

Lainne Love: 00:21:25

possible, I think, really helps to change that. The inner dialog

Lainne Love: 00:21:29

and the narrative

Jennifer Takagi: 00:21:32

I had a recent conversation, actually as a

Jennifer Takagi: 00:21:34

podcast interview, and she deals a lot with grief, and she was

Jennifer Takagi: 00:21:39

talking about how it's okay to feel joy, but it can be very

Jennifer Takagi: 00:21:43

difficult when you're going through grief to feel joyful,

Jennifer Takagi: 00:21:48

and you're like, oh, I should feel guilty because I shouldn't

Jennifer Takagi: 00:21:51

feel joy. And so we ended up in a little bit of a short

Jennifer Takagi: 00:21:54

conversation on when, when your grief becomes sinful because you

Jennifer Takagi: 00:21:59

can't enjoy the the joy and the beauty that life has and and it

Jennifer Takagi: 00:22:03

does take on its own time frame, its own process. I think if

Jennifer Takagi: 00:22:09

someone were to ask me, it's just keeping that conscious

Jennifer Takagi: 00:22:13

attention that I want to move through the process like I don't

Jennifer Takagi: 00:22:18

want to stay in this place of this level of heartbreak, I want

Jennifer Takagi: 00:22:23

to, even if it's a slow pace, I still want to be moving forward.

Lainne Love: 00:22:30

And you're, you're experiencing that in yourself.

Lainne Love: 00:22:33

You know, we're just, we're, I was just discussing the loss of

Lainne Love: 00:22:38

somebody else in my life, but it it is that similar experience of

Lainne Love: 00:22:44

grief within yourself when you're changing a pattern,

Lainne Love: 00:22:48

because that has been a part of you for so long, or maybe it's

Lainne Love: 00:22:52

been an ancestral pattern, so the weight of it, or the

Lainne Love: 00:22:57

momentum of it feels heavier, and the resistance of letting it

Lainne Love: 00:23:01

go, or that even the feelings of of guilt I've had some guilt of

Lainne Love: 00:23:08

letting go, some patterns like, Oh my God. Like, oh, I'm wishing

Lainne Love: 00:23:12

that you were gone. Oh

Lainne Love: 00:23:14

god,

Lainne Love: 00:23:15

that's horrible of me. Like, isn't that an interesting inner

Lainne Love: 00:23:18

dialog to have in in letting go of a pattern so that I could

Lainne Love: 00:23:24

move towards my idea and my definition of success. So yes,

Lainne Love: 00:23:31

notice, notice what you notice. And grief can be, it can be a

Lainne Love: 00:23:35

part, and actually is a part of all, all of the things. So just

Lainne Love: 00:23:39

notice how, how you're responding to that, because

Lainne Love: 00:23:42

exactly it said, maybe you're finding it hard to to move into

Lainne Love: 00:23:47

joy when you're letting go of this pattern and you're you're

Lainne Love: 00:23:50

looking to create something new and and then how do you heal

Lainne Love: 00:23:54

that? So okay, if that is what you're experiencing, I'm

Lainne Love: 00:23:59

experiencing this part of grief. How is it that I move forward,

Lainne Love: 00:24:02

and how it is that you just, you move forward as you just notice

Lainne Love: 00:24:06

when, and then let yourself sit with that, you know, okay, I'm

Lainne Love: 00:24:12

experiencing that. I'm feeling guilt for, for moving forward,

Lainne Love: 00:24:17

and maybe I'm leaving my family behind, because my family all

Lainne Love: 00:24:21

acts like this, and me, and in shifting this, choosing to shift

Lainne Love: 00:24:26

this, this pattern, means that I am breaking free from, in some

Lainne Love: 00:24:32

way, of my family, my ancestral lineage, and I feel a weight

Lainne Love: 00:24:37

with that, just actually being honest with yourself, You just

Lainne Love: 00:24:41

sit with it and let yourself feel the weight, and the more

Lainne Love: 00:24:44

that you let yourself feel the weight, and the more honest you

Lainne Love: 00:24:47

are with yourself, then the lighter that it becomes, because

Lainne Love: 00:24:51

you're just you're acknowledging it, and you're allowing it to be

Lainne Love: 00:24:55

what it is, instead of fighting against it, it's the fighting

Lainne Love: 00:24:58

against it. It's not that. Having the initial feeling that

Lainne Love: 00:25:02

causes the the challenge in your life. It's the fighting against

Lainne Love: 00:25:10

what you're actually experiencing and making it wrong

Lainne Love: 00:25:13

that then causes the challenge.

Jennifer Takagi: 00:25:16

And I love that you brought up several different

Jennifer Takagi: 00:25:20

things on what we grieve, because a lot of times we I'll

Jennifer Takagi: 00:25:29

go with me. I was brought up trained, witnessed experience

Jennifer Takagi: 00:25:35

that you grieve the loss of a person, whether they die or it's

Jennifer Takagi: 00:25:40

a relationship and breaks up like those are the things that

Jennifer Takagi: 00:25:42

you grieve. And what I've learned is we grieve all kinds

Jennifer Takagi: 00:25:47

of things. We we grieve the job we didn't get. We grieve that we

Jennifer Takagi: 00:25:53

were tired and left our friends and colleagues behind. We grieve

Jennifer Takagi: 00:25:58

that we wanted this one thing so much, and it it fell apart and

Jennifer Takagi: 00:26:04

didn't come through. Like, there's, there's so many

Jennifer Takagi: 00:26:06

different oh, what word do we want to use? I'm going to go

Jennifer Takagi: 00:26:10

with opportunity. There are so many opportunities to grieve

Jennifer Takagi: 00:26:13

different things, but like you say, we usually just gloss over

Jennifer Takagi: 00:26:17

them and move on, and they're going to trip you up at some

Jennifer Takagi: 00:26:20

point. Like, if you don't take the chance to do it, like you

Jennifer Takagi: 00:26:24

say, do the work, you're gonna get tripped up a little bit

Jennifer Takagi: 00:26:28

Absolutely,

Lainne Love: 00:26:29

and that is Ta da, we've just summed up life for

Lainne Love: 00:26:33

you. And that's life, that's the work, that's that's the stuff.

Lainne Love: 00:26:39

Those are the steps. Is just like looking at all the ways in

Lainne Love: 00:26:43

which we're just trying to avoid feeling something that creates

Lainne Love: 00:26:50

all of the challenges and the blockages that we then

Lainne Love: 00:26:53

experience that are keeping us from the things that we actually

Lainne Love: 00:26:56

want, and they're just keeping us there because they're like,

Lainne Love: 00:26:59

but that's like 100 down the line, you still have all of

Lainne Love: 00:27:02

these things that you have to attend to before you can get

Lainne Love: 00:27:05

there. You made the order, but there's 100 other orders in

Lainne Love: 00:27:10

front of you, and that we're not realizing, because we have just

Lainne Love: 00:27:14

pushed them aside, not realizing that we actually just made that

Lainne Love: 00:27:18

order, and so you have to actually attend to it, to clear

Lainne Love: 00:27:22

it so that you can get down the line to the thing that you're

Lainne Love: 00:27:26

actually desiring. And that's cool. It's cool to know that.

Lainne Love: 00:27:30

Oh, so that's all I have to do, is I just have to do the work

Lainne Love: 00:27:34

amazing. I'm gonna copy, we assimilate

Jennifer Takagi: 00:27:37

the word work with hard. Yeah, it's not always

Jennifer Takagi: 00:27:42

hard. Sometimes it is, but it doesn't have to always be hard.

Jennifer Takagi: 00:27:46

So how do you how do you work with people? How do you help

Jennifer Takagi: 00:27:50

with people like, how do we get in contact with you? Tell me

Jennifer Takagi: 00:27:53

more. Tell me more.

Lainne Love: 00:27:56

You can find me so easily@laney.com I got lucky. I

Lainne Love: 00:28:01

got l, a, I n, n, e.com, and you can find me social media at Lani

Lainne Love: 00:28:07

love at all the places, Instagram, LinkedIn, Facebook,

Lainne Love: 00:28:13

actually, not all the places, mostly just those ones. It's too

Lainne Love: 00:28:18

much to try to keep up with all of the things so my goodness,

Lainne Love: 00:28:21

but isn't it wonderful that we have those tools and it is so

Lainne Love: 00:28:26

easy to be able to connect? And how do I work with people?

Lainne Love: 00:28:30

Basically, if I'm summing it up, I get to sit down with people

Lainne Love: 00:28:34

and listen for the things that they're not hearing. Ooh, and,

Lainne Love: 00:28:40

you know, and then give them, uh, reflect that back at them,

Lainne Love: 00:28:44

so then they can hear them, and then give them tools and

Lainne Love: 00:28:47

processes they can use so that they can move through that

Lainne Love: 00:28:50

challenge with greater ease, grace and flow, so that they can

Lainne Love: 00:28:54

have what it is that they're wanting in their life, you know,

Lainne Love: 00:28:58

that's, that's what all, all the work is about, right?

Jennifer Takagi: 00:29:03

And your most of that is one on one. Yeah, I

Lainne Love: 00:29:06

love working one on one with people. Sometimes I

Lainne Love: 00:29:08

work in groups too, because that's that can be lots of fun

Lainne Love: 00:29:13

too. There's something really magical about a group dynamic,

Lainne Love: 00:29:16

and when people get to share with each other. And I love

Lainne Love: 00:29:21

getting to work one on one with people, because I really like to

Lainne Love: 00:29:24

be able to laser focus and hear what it is that's very specific

Lainne Love: 00:29:27

for them, so that they can accelerate the movement in their

Lainne Love: 00:29:31

life and get to living into their bigger mission, so that

Lainne Love: 00:29:35

they can, you know, live their legacy of love and and share

Lainne Love: 00:29:40

their unique blueprint and imprint with the planet, as

Lainne Love: 00:29:44

we're all meant to do.

Jennifer Takagi: 00:29:46

Oh my gosh, I love that. As we wrap up, do you

Jennifer Takagi: 00:29:50

have any final thoughts you want to share with the audience?

Jennifer Takagi: 00:29:54

Yeah, keep

Lainne Love: 00:29:55

going. Keep going. Dig deeper within yourself. Keep

Lainne Love: 00:29:58

going you can do. It. I've been flat on my face and belly

Lainne Love: 00:30:03

crawled many times in my life. I definitely know what that feels

Lainne Love: 00:30:09

like. And you can keep going. There's more within you, and

Lainne Love: 00:30:13

that you matter. You matter so much. You are a one of a kind

Lainne Love: 00:30:18

winner. There has only been one you in the history of the

Lainne Love: 00:30:22

universe, and there only ever will be one of you. And really

Lainne Love: 00:30:26

sit with that. That's not those aren't just words. That's a

Lainne Love: 00:30:30

reality. There is only one you in the history of the universe.

Lainne Love: 00:30:37

You are so important, and you are here for a reason, and you

Lainne Love: 00:30:42

have a purpose, so get out there and do it.

Jennifer Takagi: 00:30:48

I love that lady. Love ladies and gentlemen,

Jennifer Takagi: 00:30:52

Words To Live By. I'm Jennifer Takagi with destin for success,

Jennifer Takagi: 00:30:57

and I look forward to connecting with you soon. Bye, thank you

Jennifer Takagi: 00:31:04

for taking your time to spend with me on this latest podcast

Jennifer Takagi: 00:31:08

of destined for success. Please take a moment to leave a review.

Jennifer Takagi: 00:31:13

Share it with a friend and subscribe and get the newest

Jennifer Takagi: 00:31:17

episodes every Monday morning. I'm Jennifer Takagi, and I look

Jennifer Takagi: 00:31:21

forward to connecting with you soon. You.